May 31, 2018 Dismissive tactics are fairly well understood, especially in social justice and debate circles. In the adoption arena, however, these tactics take on a willful blindness and venom which is truly disturbing. Let's explore some of the most commonly used phrases. "Not all adoptions are the same." "What if the mother won't parent?" "Well what do you suggest, then?" "I'm sorry you had a bad experience, but..." Really, I could fill a blog with "phrases commonly used to dismiss anyone who has anything negative to say about adoption" but I won't waste my time or yours reiterating that familiar drivel. We all know the phrases. We've all been told we "just had a bad experience". We all have experience with those that dismiss because they don't like our tone.Dismiss being the key word. Phrases like "not all...", "what if...", angry, bitter, bad experience, and "can